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Current time:0:00Total duration:1:49

Writing: Concision — Basic example

Writing: Grammar

Video transcript

- [Instructor] A new solar-powered bicycle can reach speeds of up to as high as 30 miles per hour. So this as I read it, that felt awkward. It felt like I said more than I needed to say. Up to as high as 30 miles per hour. Not even looking at the choices, if I were to write this in a more concise way, in kind of a cleaner, more efficient way, I would say a new solar-powered bicycle can reach speeds of up to 30 miles per hour. I don't even need to write as high as 30 miles per hour. So let's see what our choices are. So I already said I definitely want to change it, so I'm not gonna pick no change. And just replacing this with up to isn't one of these choices, so I'm gonna have to look a little bit more closely at these. A new solar-powered bicycle can reach speeds of upwards and close to 30 miles per hour. This also feels very bulky, way more words than I need to use and also doesn't make a lot of sense. To be upwards and close to? I mean, are they saying upwards of 30 miles per hour and also close to? It feels like a very strange phrasing and definitely using more words than I need to use. A new solar-powered bicycle can reach speeds of nearly 30 miles per hour. Yeah, I like that. It's actually, in some ways, it's more concise. Actually, it's one word versus two words that I had right over here. So I like that, nearly, that's very clean, very concise, really straight to the point, easy to read. A new solar-powered bicycle can reach speeds of nearly 30 miles per hour. And then over here, the last choice, you have nearly as high as. Once again, this feels very bulky. It's using more words than I need to use when I can just use nearly, why would I use nearly as high as? So I would rule that one out as well.